No Means No

It is one of the first words they say.  It is one of the first words we dread.  It seems that little, perfect being you love is beginning to turn into a monster.  We are dumbfounded that this little baby now refuses to listen.  We are blind sighted after they first utter the word, "No!"

When our darling little infant turns into a demanding toddler, it can be more than disheartening.  They may look cute and sweet, but learning to share and listen to caregivers brings out those terrible twos.  What if we looked at their seeming defiance another way?  They are learning to stand up for themselves.  Learning who to listen to and who to say no to is a vital skill that will keep them from harm and build confidence.  They are learning what is acceptable and not acceptable.  They are learning the rules and where the boundaries lie.  This is some very important work.  They are learning if words really do mean anything or not.

Fast forward a few years.  That toddler is in elementary school, and a bully is trying to start a fight.  If the child's will was broken in earlier years, he does nothing but endure a beating.  If the child learned what to say no to and what not to say no to, he is more likely to stand up for himself.  Of course, personality and physicality play a part in future decision-making. Nonetheless, learning good boundaries makes the world feel safe.  It leads to an outlook on life that is secure and more capable of handling problems.  So remember, the next time you hear a little one yell, "NO!", it's an opportunity-not a disaster.